Finances

 

What specific thoughts or lessons shared by Poduska are most relevant and applicable to you as you either prepare for marriage or adjust to financial challenges in marriage?

 

I really enjoyed reading Poduska’s lessons about finances. I especially enjoyed the part about the birth order clusters. As it listed the birth order of first-born, second-born, middle child, and last born, I began to see myself and my husband in the descriptions. He is not a first-born child, but he sure resembles the characteristics of a first-born. He is excellent with finances, he knows how to manage money effectively and plan purchases. He is very responsible. He did have some control issues when we were first married because my habits didn’t jive with his, but he has gotten better. I have improved a great deal as well. I do appreciate the opportunity that I have had to learn so much from him. My style was and has been that of the middle child and last born placement descriptions. I was the baby for 5 years, then two more siblings joined our family, so I feel that the combination of the two types of descriptions have set the way for how I am. Poduska explains middle born children are budget followers, but they seek to please others. I was and can be a people pleaser at times. I want to feel accepted or loved, instead of rejected. Therefore, I buy elaborate gifts in order to be “wanted” so to speak. I do struggle with this a lot, especially around this time of the year, Christmas time. I want to buy everything for everyone.

I can take on the last born spot because I was used to being the baby for a while and got what I wanted. There are many times where I am self-indulgent. I am better than I was, but I am still paying for decisions I made in previous years because of the debt I accrued. It is a sad and long road to get rid of debt. I feel like I am in bondage. I have strived to overcome my tendencies by working within a budget, but I often feel like the “scarcity” rears its ugly head to make me make impulsive or emotional decisions, instead of being mindful with my purchases. My husband surely does ground me by preventing me from getting carried away. I am thankful for him. He is the string to my kite.

 Financial freedom requires us to be grounded, so that we can soar higher. Idea from reading and understanding that the financial strategies are important to follow.

Google search “kite”: http://www.bing.com/images/search?q=kite+clipart&FORM=HDRSC2

 

In what ways do you think a couple and family could benefit from having a weekly couple council? Moreover, what are the specific principles highlighted by Elder Ballard that would especially be relevant and applicable to a couple council?

 

I think a weekly council is a brilliant idea. I think it gives a couple a change to come together on the goals that they have been working on individually and collectively. I think it gives each person a chance to share their ideas, thoughts, concerns, hopes, etc. It lets everyone be heard and make a contribution to the group. It provides people with the opportunity to receive inspiration from others. I know that I often get greater insight when I listen to my husband comment on my thoughts, goals, etc. Usually when we combine our efforts we get great results or experience a lot of synergy. It truly energizes us when we can brainstorm and plan things out together. My husband has many gifts and talents that I don’t have and vice versa. It give us to chance to share, help, and serve one another.

In Elder Ballard’s book, I found it quite fascinating the process which the councils counsel together. They seek to work together and create unity. I think that is the part that stands out to me as the most important aspect of a council. I think striving for unity is key. It allows all involved to be heard and requires members to be respectful and understanding. When the members of the council are allowed to freely and openly share their thoughts and feelings, it gives others a chance to see a new perspective. We all have bits and truth as is suggested by Elder Ucthdorf from a talk about truth. We all have bits of truth and if we can share our truth with others, it not only enlarges their truth, but it enlarges our own truth as well. I love being able to see the difference of opinion or points of view of another person. I consider that they see something that I don’t, so listening and seeking to understand may broaden my own understanding. All are edified as I am sure this would be Christ’s goal. He wants us all to grow, learn, and develop. This can best be accomplished if we are all working together. That unity is vital to the success of the gospel and our own goals.